Every month, European and U.S. counterparts from various embassies would gather for wine and cheese. For the most part, the group was like-minded, even when their partisanship differed. Then came Donald Trump.
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On Tuesday, Zoya Sheftalovich penned a report for Politico’s EU vertical about a long-running U.S. tradition of small, private dinners that helped build trust and coordinate with European allies. Sadly, however, it has mostly faded since Trump came back into office.
Those dinners once brought together ambassadors, EU officials and other closely aligned partners for honest, off-the-record chats about trade, security and foreign policy, often helping participants understand each other’s red lines before formal negotiations began. It built goodwill, and even through disagreements, allies could stick together and help each other when needed.
The report says the disappearance of a simple dinner is only one part of a broader shift in U.S.-European Union relations under Trump, as Washington has become more confrontational toward Europe through tariffs, NATO threats and attacks on the EU as an adversary. Diplomats argue that the shift away from intimate relationship-building toward larger, more superficial events has weakened America’s influence in Brussels and reduced the candid intelligence-sharing that once made the previous gatherings so valuable.
“This stuff is the blood in the veins of the diplomatic system,” said one former U.S. diplomat who spoke on the condition of anonymity.
“It’s like, ‘I can’t say this formally, but informally, these are our red lines, these are my considerations, the political realities in my country, and I don’t understand why you can’t do X, Y and Z,'” they added.
“With 10 or 12 people around a table, you can actually have conversations,” said one EU diplomat who also wanted to remain nameless. “You can talk to everybody. You come away having learned something.”
The first former diplomat explained that relationships are built over time through these dinners. “You get people aligned in a common direction around common goals; you find out where people’s red lines are.”
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“That’s why the U.S. was able to do this for 70 years before the system broke down under Trump,” the former diplomat said.
“There was a whole ecosystem that developed around these things,” said one EU diplomat.
Under Trump’s ambassadors, the dinners are much grander, embracing the excess that Trump is known for. Current U.S. Ambassador Andrew Puzder hosts glitzy receptions and packed social events, the diplomat said. “They are pleasant. But when there are a hundred people in a room, you spend the evening saying hello, not having meaningful conversations.”
Another EU diplomat explained, former Ambassador Mark “Gitenstein threw parties like a diplomat and [Andrew] Puzder throws parties like a businessman.” Gitenstein would hold an event, and then another person would hold the next dinner meeting. The only scandal is that “the ambassadors, through their chefs, would try to outcompete each other.”
“There was an ego thing about who had the best chef,” said one former diplomat.
One former diplomat said that Puzder believes he’s done what he can with what he’s got, but “it’s brutal being Trump’s ambassador. Trump is not making Puzder’s job easy.”
The U.S. Mission to the EU called it “categorically false” that Puzder has scaled back the dinners. They insist “he meets regularly with EU and non-EU ambassadors on a range of topics.”
“Ambassador Puzder has also hosted and attended multiple dinners and gatherings with like-minded counterparts, bringing together groups with shared interests to ensure EU policy outcomes support EU and American security and prosperity,” the U.S. mission to the EU said.
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